Fat nigga tendancies

Yes, you read it right. It's official, I have to soul of a 300 pound that just loves to eat. I know I shouldn't say this around my the time of my Saviour's birthday, but some food is just as good as sex. I had some fried turkey today and I just ate and went to sleep. When I woke up I felt like I had been through a marathon of love making. Nobody could say anything to mess that moment up for me. I hope I'm not addicted to food. And if I was, SO WHAT! I work out so it gets put to use, but by the time I get back to Florida, I will have gained a few pounds, oh well. But you know you got a problem when other hungry fat dudes look at you and go "Where are you putting all that?" My grandmother use to tell me that I had hollow legs. And it seems like it sometimes. Anyway, I'm about to get on this seafood. Merry Christmas...bitches.

100 and something

Before I get started I want to say HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my homegirl, my ace, and one of my best friends...MY MAMA. Actually it's Happy Belated Birthday cause it was yesterday. I just forgot to write about it yesterday. Anyway, here is a quick run down of me in a survey:

100 Things About Me

1. I miss seeing the setting sun in California.
2. I'm an only child.
3. My hometown is Pensacola, FL.
4. I was 12 years old the first time I dunked.
5. I was always the tallest kid in school until I got to high school.
6. I'm 6'5, 6'6 on a good day.
7. I've always had a thing for Delta's.
8. I'm not sure if I have ever been trully in love, but I'm waiting on her.
9. I'm allergic to bullshyt.
10. I'm young, black, male, and gifted with no criminal record.
11. I just started eating fish about 4 years and I don't like Salmon.
12. My favorite fruit is grapefruit.
13. My major is Communications.
14. I've been out the country once, Mexico Summer '03
15. Floetry's song "Say Yes" gets me a little warm.
16. I can't sing, but I still try.
17. I want to visit New York City.
18. I have a secret and shoe obession.
19. A good pen makes me feel smart and creative.
20. I love taking naps.
21. I walk with a slight limp because of an broken ankle.
22. I love black women, I can't wait to meet her.
23. I like to make up slang words. (Tina Knowles Original, Brofessional)
24. I love to read.
25. I am addicted to laughter.
26. I would rather go to a game than watch it on tv.
27. No matter the intensity, I usually keep my feelings to myself.
28. My biggest fear is not living up to my potential.
29. I wish I still had my fro.
30. I use fabric softners sheets in my vents to keep my place smelling clean.
31. I think kissing is an extremely intimate act.
32. One day I want kids.
33. I'm not scared of commitment. I think. Maybe.
34. I can start an conversation with anyone.
35. I love Cartier Colonge.
36. I think I was born too early.
37. I'm on a one year contract.
38. I have a low tolernace for drama.
39. I've never said "I love you" first.
40. I can count my number of "friends" on one hand.
41. I've been on one cruise.
42. I love the beach.
43. I voted...for Sen. Kerry in the Presidential election :-(
44. I'm scared of snakes.
45. Sometimes my mind goes in 100 directions at once.
46. I've never experienced stage fright.
47. I was recruited by D-1 schools for basketball but D-2 schools for track.
48. My mother thinks I should've majored in Computer Engineering.
49. I'm scared of clowns.
50. I love track and field. (Sexy Marion Jones...yeah.)
51. I over study till my head hurts.
52. I'm a perfectionist when it comes to projects.
53. I don't trust many people.
54. I adore my baby cousins.
55. I'm very sensitive to medication.
56. No girlfriend of mine father has ever like me.
57. My favorite movie is Coming To America.
58. I dislike all the black shows on UPN.
59. I want to write a best seller book.
60. I love to shop.
61. I love to work.
62. I love home cooked meals.
63. Sometimes I say things just to see the expression on people's faces.
64. I admire people who are quietly intellectual.
65. I write best in the middle of the night.
66. I smoked a real Cuban cigar once.
67. Gabrille Union is SO SEXY to me.
68. I get migranies.
69. I can impersonate many people.
70. I watch too much Chappelle Show.
71. You tell me a secret, you'll never here it again.
72. I love to recieve letters.
73. Once I set my mind on something, I go get it...period.
74. I talk to myself, quite a bit, but I don't answer myself
75. Sometimes I listen to John Coltrane to go to sleep.
76. I am on a constant quest for knowledge.
77. I can't spell out loud.
78. I do almost everything left-handed except write.
79. Sometimes, I don't want to pay my bills.
80. I've broken every watch I've ever owned.
81. I believe sex is a drug, but when I get married I wanna get high in my wife's love. lol.
82. I embarass real easy.
83. I'm sometimes mean to people that are close to me.
84. I wear size 14 shoes.
85. My big toe is not the longest toe on my feet.
86. I'm still waiting on "her", whoever she may be.
87. My printed handwriting is pretty good for a man.
88. Large groups of strangers make me nervous.
89. I'm too nice sometimes.
90. I'm too mean sometimes.
91. I'm undecided on the concept of soulmates.
92. But I am a romantic.
93. I am my own worst critic.
94. I love to be underestimated.
95. I believe you should always be able to laugh at yourself.
96. I grind my teeth in my sleep.
97. I love to be kissed on my ear lobe.
98. I always mispell Wensday...Wednesday.
99. Chest hair on a woman is my biggest turn off.
100. I love having a realtionship with God.

We have go to do better than this...

Why does your birthday have to be a couple of days before Christmas? I love you and all, but as you've gotten older you gifts have gotten a little more exspensive. I don't know. Either way, happy birthday mama. I'd pass out a few birthday lics, but black folks know the rules. You don't put your hands on your mama. Not just that, I'm afraid you can still whip my ass. You think I'm lifting all these weights for my health? Uh...no. One day. Me and you buddy. You can't punk me all your life. I'm just playing. Happy Birthday.

1 more day

I got one more day of work before I can get down the road to Pensacola, and we can get on the road and get to North Carolina. I'm so happy. Not really. I just though of the possibilty of severe cold weather and I just got nervous. I don't see how some people do the cold weather, snow, and just those freezing temps. There is so much I like doing, especially running, that requires being outside. If I move up north I am going to have to have a gym in my house. Anyway, I am picking out what I want to wear. You know I gotta get fly. It was just me and my mom going at first, but we rented an SUV and my grandmother, Uncle, and cousin are going too. This will be interesting. At least all the snoring keeps me awake while I drive. I know it will be me and my Uncle Sidney doing the bulk, if not all, of the driving. But it won't be too bad. I'm gonna get some music and hopefully all will be cool. Well, thats it for me. I need to be about this business.

Cater 2 Me

Last night was good. It's nice to be pampered for a minute. A little convo, a little cheesecake, a good brush through your hair. It was good. I can't say anything more than that at the moment. You never know who is reading this. lol! I'm off today so I can relax. Stunt on the couch and then go work out. HI ASHLEY!

Sunday Evening Hoops

Growing up I remember every single Sunday, except for those winter months, was spent playing basketball after church. Well, just about all of them. You know of course you weren't allowed out the house those days when you had to go back to evening service for a program, like Easter or something. Anyway, since injuries have put me down, I try to watch as much as possible. So I went to our game this afternoon. I gotta admit the team was balling today, but they still have a way to go. The played hard againist Miss. St, but they got UAB, and FSU coming up soon. Those have the potential to be ugly if they are not on top of thier games. Anyway, I sat with Keke and Kenya during the game. I know that is a sight a lot of people haven't seen in a minute. It's crazy, when I first got to South I thought she had a little extra attitude. She always looked like she was in a bad mood, but it wasn't long before Keke and I crossed paths. We became good friends over the past year. Her daughter Kenya is cool, and it was real funny when President Moulton's wife thought Kenya was my child. So while we are in the President's luxury box, we acted like father and daughter the entire night. It was so funny that Keke left and see how I could handle a child on my own. I did a good job. Well...at least thats what all the people around me said. Even our SGA president Clay says "I didn't know you had a kid...?" And just give him that look like, I don't dummy. I guess we are good friends if you feel like you can leave your child with me. Especially when you know I fight kids. No...For real I do. You're child is acting up and you leave them with me, there is a good chance I'll put them in a head lock. Anyway, where was I? Oh basketball. Best game ever. It has done a lot for my life. But not as much as my God who gave me the talent and knowledge to play the game. So when I say I love basketball, it's another way I'm saying I love the Lord. When I say basketball has done a lot for me, I'm giving God his praise. So to me, basketball is more than a game, it was a bride to relationship with my creator.

Hold my mule.

My neck...My back, my neck and my back! Naw, they feel better. I got to sleep today. And I'm so happy. I'm on this Law study guide now, so this is it for the night. I'm just glad I got some rest. Holla.

I can't sleep

So I laid down in the bed about 2, then 3 came, the 4, then 5 a.m.! Last thing I know it was about 5:30 and the second episode of Mama' Family was coming on. So it was closer to 6 a.m. when I fell asleep. But the crazy thing is Kenisha called at 6:45 to tell me something, what is was I don't remember. Then I went back to sleep just to hear my alarm at 8. I was sick out of my mind all day for the lack of sleep. I was hurting. I was burned out at one point I was so tired. School and finals are not gonna hold me down. I'm not gonna get stressed. I get the next day off for dead day so I can sleep tonight. Anyway, I figured a few things out in all that time I couldn't sleep and the tv was on. First, the entire cast of Full House needs to be dragged out into the street and beaten. I can't believe America was in love with that show for so many years. It's pointless, it's dull, and full of Sesame Street lessons. Now if that had been black folks on Full House, there would have been lessons learned, but there would have been some butts whipped in that house. Then there would be a Big Mama in the house too, and she would have whooped some behinds as well. Also, The Tanners never went to church either. Not once. Even the Winslows from Family Matters went to church sometimes. But then again, you live next door to Steve Urkel you need to go to church. Anyway, the lack of sleep has me talking silly. By the time I get back up I should feel better. Hopefully, this feeling will pass. Gotta lay down. Peace.

On the run

Monday, Monday, Monday. What is it that I don't like about this day? I'm not even stressing it right now. I gotta get on this work for this debate on Wensday so I gotta cut this extra short. Plus I want to get to the gym if I can. Holla.

I'm rich!

Before I go on, I'd like to take the time to put my disclaimer on this entry.

The following entry resulted from an idea between two friends, and friends only. This entry does not reflect my values on dating, love, sex, or relationships in regardless to my spiritual background. It is soley based for the purpose of entertainment. Any conclusions drawn by the reader are more than likely to be unfounded and useless. Thank you.

Over the Thanksgiving Break, my friend Ashley (from Freedom School in STL) and I decided that we would be each other's "special someone", since neither of us has an official significant other. We both received plenty of well-wishes and "Happy Thanksgivings", but none from that one person that we can claim as our "own". So we signed a temporary contract that was supposed to last through Sunday that we would function as temporary significant others. Well, after plenty of negotiation, we extended the contract for a year, full benefits and exclusive rights to each other as a franchise. Can you tell that we are a little crazy? I sound like an agent. Well here are the details:

Her contract:
* 1 year, 5.5 million, 2.1 million signing bonus
* private office
* guaranteed "quality" booty at LEAST twice a week
* exclusive rights
* PDA until 35 days before my contract expires (gotta seem approachable to those interested in signing me for next season)
* Quality Time
* One mention in the blog per week

My contract: * 1 year, 5 million, 1 million signing bonus
* Personal assistant available from 7am to 9pm
* Quality booty agreement, plus an added "love for the sake of loving" clause. (Basically, entitlement to more booty if need be)
* added trust, friendship and honesty clauses
* exclusive rights
* less attitude from her
* PDA agreement
* one mention in the blog per week
* Quality Time
* brownies on my birthday

As you can see, we are crazy. I'm glad that nut is in my life though. But wouldn't it be great if relationships could come with a contract like athletes? That way, everyone would know what was expected of them and if anybody messed up, you can drop them, have them return your investments and signing bonuses (whether it be time, money, clothes, love, trust...etc) and go about your business. Perhaps prenuptial are similar but they are not in depth enough and only in effect for married couples. I bet if dating couples had to sign a one year agreement and were re-signed based on performance, fools wouldn't act so crazy. At the very least, you could squeeze 3 months of good behavior out before they know their contract is winding down. Yeah, I think this is a good idea. So any young ladies that are interested have to now speak to my agent, as I am a signed young man. This is great, I can defer all offers to my agent. Just don't ask me who my agent is because I'm not sure I know. But I am happy with my decision to sign with Ashley and I think we will have a successful year together.

Child proof caps

I woke up around 1:30, and of course I got left. And I didn't feel so bad about that, but er'bdoy came home and left again before I woke up. No one said anything. Half of the folks in the house didn't know I stayed there that night and the other half thought I was gone already. But then again, I was the last person to go to sleep, I was in the back room, and I parked my car out of sight. Oh well. Other than this migraine I had today, it was a good day. I ran into my Uncle Chris at the barber shop, that's my father's brother, and we talked for a minute but my head was still thumping and I fell asleep in the next chair when he stopped talking. I told him I was gonna come to the house since everybody was on home. Anyway, my head is still a little numb so I am gonna lay down. Yeah...

Next time just leave me there...

I WAS SO TIRED TODAY. I feel asleep while checking my answers on a test. That's real. I'm not even bout to be on here long. I was feeling low on energy the day before, but dang homie. I was tempted to skip every class today in attempt to get some rest. Anyway...Holla at cha boy. I'm even too tired to eat. Holla.

Running on E

Oh baby. I wish I had some energy today. I've been fatigued for a minute. I know part of the problem is I missed my morning workout throwing my body off, and I haven't been drinking enough water. I had to drag myself out the bed, drag myself to class, drag myself to the gym. Now I gotta drag myself to IHOP and study. I really need to get on it too. No big test, just need to stay up, stay ready. Ya know? Anyway, nothing serious to report. I feel some energy coming back just thinking about IHOP. lol. It's time to get my grub on. It's ya boy!

And when I leave...Come together like butt cheeks!

mood: blah
music: Why Does (112)

Today was just another day. Still incredibly stiff. Played over at Murphy today. We won. No big deal. I had a philly cheesesteak before I went to play ball today. Lets say I still don't feel good. That one got me. Anyway, it was cool cause I got the chance to chill with my homeboys today. Haven't done that in a minute. But tomorrow starts a new week. I'm gonna get on this running thing hard again. Hopefully, I can stay on there for a entire hour. I enjoy working out and once the break is over, I'd like to be back in playing shape. But I have to drink more water and stretch. It would be nice if KJ came through and helped me with that strecthing thing. I got a few new strecthes from her squad's warm ups that helped me a lot. Anyway, I watched The Day After Tomorrow on dvd last night, that was crazy. Looking at it from an academic stand point, that whole thing blew me cause of Dr. Sebastian's class. Matter of fact we watched a video on tornado's during lecture, and it was crazy too. This lady was like..."It picked me up and a cow flew by me...", so of course I laughed. Oh well. I talked to a couple of people from Jersey Freedom School this weekend. Talked to one from Kansas City too, hmmmmmm, wonder when I will talk to one from Mobile where I worked. I really didn't feel like I fit in with that group. I was the only intern who was not from Alabama. Then everybody kinda hung our knew each other before they got there. Half of them went to high school together. Brenton and I were cool, but for the most part I still felt left out. Even though I knew 3 of the pople before I got there. Er'body was aiight for the most part, I didn't get along with one person in particalr, but all of that will be told in due time. Anyway, it's time to make that turn to the bed. Tomorrow will be a good one...Watch the kid.

Me from A to Z

Me from A TO Z...?

Let's see how long these last.

A - Age: Don't worry about it.
B - Best Friend: Currently accepting applications.
C - Choice of Meat: Shrimp
D - Dream Date: Whatever Gabrille Union wants to do.
E - Exciting Adventure: Driving cross country.
F - Favorite Food: Cabbage and macaroni and cheese.
G - Greatest Accomplishment: Got some things, not ready to answer yet.
H - Happiest Day of Your Life: Too many to name. God has been good to me.
I - Interests: Too many to name. But I love to read in my spare time.
J - Joke: I want some affection! It's an inside joke.
K - Kool-Aid: GRAPE! Is there any other?
L - Love: Read on further in my journal.
M - Most Valued possession: My peace of mind.
N - Name: Everett Douglas
O - Outfit You Love: Black State Property Hoodie and White Air Force 1's
P - Pizza Toppings: Pineapple
Q - Question Asked To You the Most: How tall are you?
R - Radio Station: 93 WBLX
S - Sport: Basketball, or course.
T - Television Show: Chappelle Show, I'm rich biatch!
U - Umbrella in the rain?: Yep. But it's fun to plan in the rain sometimes.
V - Video: Eminem - Mosh
W - Winter: Better than these hot ass southern summers.
X - X-rays recently?: Knee
Y - Year Born: 198something
Z - Zodiac Sign: ARIES! The 1st sign.

Interesting day

Alright. Kenisha has done a couple of things that have taken my breath away. Some good and one bad, but today is a great reason to smile. Another birthday up and another reason to celebrate. I must admit God has truly blessed me with someone special. Don't get it twisted I keep my guard up but today was the time to let it down and relax. I didn't think someone could be this sweet to me in the romantic sense. I've gotten so use to hearing complaining and nonsense from Audra in the past that I look for bad things to happen on joyous occasions. Anyway, I'm gone keep the details short cause it has been a long day. I've been up early. Answering phone calls of well wishes, doing my morning office hours, going to class, then a board of trustees meeting, then back to class that I've seen the sun rise and set today. But that is always a good thing. Full days are great. You can just lay down and call it a night when its over.

But to be brief, at 12:01 I got a knock at the door and received a cookie cake (which read "Happy Birthday Binky") and a card. Then I looked outside from the top of the stairs to see balloons tied to my car. Yeah. Anyway, I get out to the car and a prank went down. Not only did I put my hand in cake icing that was placed on the door knob when I got back upstairs, someone changed all the clocks in my room. That's how I got to see the sun rise this morning. Anyway, once I finally got out of my last class, Kenisha came and picked me up and took me out to eat. Then to a movie called Never Die Alone. Good plot, but a couple of bad actors needed work. Anyway, during a love scene a song called "Seconds of Pleasure" played. I've got to figure out who sings that song. Anyway, after that we went to the Alpha skate party and back to the crib. Sorry, no intimate details to give you. But I will say the experience was very mind blowing. Last year I took Audra out on MY birthday. Dat b...

Stop. That's not my style. Or is it? It's not. Oh well, back on my grind. Thank you Kenisha. Peace.

Thats what it is...

African American Student Association

University of South Alabama

Most Improved Student Organization Of The Year

2003-2004

As my first year pf administration winds down, I hope that my legacy is the one that everyone relfects and says this is the year that we got it turned around. I made plenty of mistakes, but no one can never say I didn't give it my all. At times it was hard, but thank God for like Tiffany, Chabris, Takerea, and Jamar. I know there were more that helped and made this thing right, but these four were here from day one, no complaints, no excuses, just results. It was fun. Thank you.

Nice day to relax

HA! I got my Kanye West cd too! We spent an interesting day together. We played cards, watched movies, talked, and enjoyed each other's company. I guess I should still be mad, but I won't waste the time today. I was kinda surprised when she bought me the cd though. Either way it was nice to have a day to relax.

So she got her court date...

I know right. I have got to working on this saying no thing. I needed a quiet place to study so I went to the library. Top floor middle table, by the window. No one is ever up there. Anyway, to my surprise she showed up. I figured it would have been too cold for her to come out that day. But please believe I was about to be the ultimate jerk about it all. She walked around for a minute looking through the books while I finished writing a paper for class. Then she sat down to talk. Honestly, I felt a little uncomfortable with myself at the moment. I just kept thinking about how she handle things, and that I was even allowing her the opportunity to even speak to me. Maybe she doesn't know how I hard I took it, but despite her reasons at the moment, the whole thing at very least was fucked up. Anyway, here we are and here we go out the door. She took me to the park. By the way, which is against the law in Mobile County to be in a public park after sunset. Well, we parked, walked for a minute, and then sat down on a bench. I didn't let her get close to me or look me in the eye. But as she explained what happened, I got a little more up tight and was really ready to go. I don't think she understands, these things aren't supposed to happen to me, but thats why we are human. It happens. However, I warmed up in the conversation when she told me this is where she would come to think about me. The countless afternoons when she wanted to see me, talk to me, be with me. I was kinda flattered. But it didn't change how I felt. I just listened...

But when we got in the car, I fired off my mouth like a cold hearted bully. For the first time I think I didn't show any compassion. Then again, I had made up in my mind stealing her food from Smokey Bones from the back seat and seeing what she had to say about it. I wound up giving it to Kirkland when we got back, cause I knew he was hungry, and I wanted Kenisha to say something crazy. Like I said, I was trying to be a jerk. Anyway, I'll see where it goes from here. I was surprised this night happened cause I wanted to be past this by now. Some how she kinda knows me. . So how did the night end? She told me loved me...Then she kissed me. She kissed me like she had been wanting to do that all night. Dang. Goodnight.

I got your court date

Well, the 2nd semester is underway. I'm kinda tired this morning. I've gotten some replies to a semester email I send out to my family and friends, and for the record I guess I wanted her to say something. But at this point, I don't care. But this was the reply:

Why can't you say my name? You don't have to say anything to me in an underlying manner. I understand that I made it this way, but I have apologized. I hope that you have forgiven me because it was sincere. Not just pretty people do ugly things, everyone does. I hope Moochiepie Face calls you Binky. If not, she doesn't see the stars in your eyes when she looks into them. Not trying to hate because I'm not jealous. I am where I need to be. Just thought you should know why I called you that. I'm prepared to make a court date in March because b-ball season will be over then. You let me know when. I hope life is grand for you. Take care!!!!

Nisha



LOL! First of all, who said I would make a "court date" with you. I didn't want to talk to you in January, and I don't want to talk to you now. My life doesn't stop, slow down, or even blink because you asked. It's not gonna happen. IF this conversation takes place, it will happen on my time and my terms. I guess the problem is that you are spoiled by all the guys who have been in your life doing exactly what you want. Come on, you should know better, it's not even an ego thing, but I don't get down like that. I'm not typical, so don't play me like I am. Do I sound frustated? I just want to close the door and lay down.

Let's be honest. I haven't slept in days, my work load is TOO much (15 credit hours and 3 jobs), my personal life in hot topic on campus, I'm tired, and to make it worse I've started drinking. I was hoping it would help me get to sleep. But it doesn't help that much. It's nothing heavy. Just a Smirnoff Ice, but drinking is not my style. God help me, I just need to sleep and have some me time. I don't know how to handle this situation is really bothering me. . So this is what I'm gonna do. Go to bed, sleep, or at least try, and remain calm. Thank you Lord for my struggles because I know you're molding me into something great. This too shall pass.

Growing In Grace (The Rated R version)

Ok. Let me lay down the basic pit falls of a young man trying to do right. I pray everyday for strentgh to make each day the best I can. The wisdom to make the best decisions for the long run. But most importantly to understand that his will, our mission, our goals are greater than me. I give an all out effort to be who I am and honor God. However, tempation is a true b****. Sorry. I really had no other word for what has been happening lately. I remember when this school year started off, I got a lot of attention. I'm use to it so no big deal. The was the case when I got to school here and that was the case last year cause people seem to gravitate to me even if I'm not comfortable with that all the time. But this year started off with slick come on lines, seductive flirting, and young ladies trying to get me a position so they can call me boo. But somewhere the heat has been turned up, severely. It doens't matter the color. There have been attempts to scoop me by all thirty one flavors. I was once told if Satan had you or you were on a border line he wasn't coming after you but me...I'm trying to hold to God's unchanging hand. However, at the same time, these women have been trying to rub on me with their hands. Earlier this week, I got a call at 3 a.m. in the morning and the young lady said..."I'm horny, I'm on my way, what are you going to do about it?" I'm thinking nothing cow. I'm going back to bed, ten minutes later she is at my door. I'm like dang, can a young man sleep? Fortunately for me, she was drunk too and after she used my bathroom she layed down on my couch and passed out. I put a blanket over her and took my butt to bed. I'm not that type of guy. Well, then there was this week in class. I'm not into white girls but this one is good looking. After class we were just discussing a few things and before I knew it she was telling me about how she liked me and hadn't said anything all year and that I could get it anytime I wanted. Now deep down inside I was tempted. Just for the fact my former teammates were running women in and out of the dorm like drugs. Thats another reason room 211 stayed locked 90% of the time. lol. It's true. I know I've made my mistakes this year but I don't want to continue with the same problem. However, the more I resist the more the pressure is applied. This one girl waited by my door one night and on my way up a homegirl mine told me she had been there for over an hour. Imagine my concern. But strangely enough, the reason why I was hour late getting back to my place was due to an SGA meeting where I was approached my this beautiful Idian girl who is an engineering student. Just my luck, she likes hip-hop and tall handsome black guys from Florida. :-l Yeah. Anyway, thats where I almost fell cause she is Angelina Jolie sexy. Her and her wavy black hair, my goodness. I need a cold shower. Oh wait, then one of our junior senators shows up at my door Saturday. Now that wasn't strange but when she came in, I thought it was just to say hi. She asks to see my goods. Then she says she would show me hers first and drops her pants in front, and yes she had nice legs. I couldn't anything but look in amazement, then excuse myself from my place. Oh, side note to that, this same young lady who dropped her pants in front of me, well her boyfriend is cheating her, and strangely enough, this young lady who I met not too long ago who claims to like me so much is sleeping with that guy. Uh...yeah. Reason number three I don't do the random sex thing: STD's. Haven't had them, don't need them, don't want them. Oh, and then there is the cute New Orleans girl who lives down stairs. Then the two volleyball girls and the one female basketball player who isn't gay, the two sororities who have a handfull they have tried, and countless others. (Shakes head) If I was a nasty dude I'd be all over this situation. I wish I was making this stuff up but it has gotten out of hand. I definetly don't want of this attention like this but it is what it is I guess. I just can't participate. Thank God for that gym cause I'd be in trouble right now. Matter of fact, let me stop pretending I'm doing my homework and get this young lady out of my room. She is watching a movie but we were supposed to go to dinner. I guess I should enjoy V-Day. She bought me a card and some candy. Nice. However, I don't feel for her what I felt for Kenisha, but I am enjoying my time and it's been cool getting to know her better. Hopefully, she isn't trying to get my booty tonight. I just can't go that route. I'm trying. Pray for me. Peace.

Out of my mind...

Ok. So I'm a little more upset about this Kenisha thing than I want to admit. But I didn't thing I would take it as far as as I did. Dang. she was fine though. She said she wanted to comfort me and in a moment of weakness I wound up having sex with this young lady for no reason. Ok, I had a reason. I wanted to at the time. But I kinda, ok I do like her, and there was time and space. That doesn't make it right. I spent the last day of finals in my room with her doing all of the things I thought I liked. Unfortunately, it wasn't my wife, it wasn't my girlfriend. I just...did it. I promised myself this wouldn't happen. I've NEVER been the random sex kind. This isn't me. I've got to be out of my mind. Anyway, it's good to be at home. I've got a date too. Yeah. I hope you didn't think I wasn't gonna just sleep with the young lady and not get to know her better. Honestly, there is nothing I can do to gonna make me feel better about what I did. I'm still shaking my head but I gotta be stronger than this situation. Pray for me. '04 and rising. Now let me go get dressed. We are meeting in Mobile tonight. Peace.

DO YOU?

Do you go quietly into the deep, dark abyss of unrealized potential and dreams, unrecognized goals and visions, unsung hymns of victory and success?

Do you stand meekly in the face of a tumultuous storm, cowering beneath the humble guise of patience and waiting, sinking in sedentary complacency tinged with hopelessness, settling for whatever circumstances happen to come your way?

Do you simply give up on the eve of a battle, declaring defeat before the first strike is ever made, waving your white flag and digging your own grave, surrendering your will to succeed in the very fight of your life?

Do you receive the negative report of your worst enemies, believing what they say, even when it goes against your faith.

Do you co-sign your own death certificate and abort your destiny, because instead of standing strong, you make the choice to succumb.?

Do you walk with the short, staggering stride of a quitter? Take apparent defeats in life as they come your way and say appeasing and comforting words to your own ego, instead of using the opportunity to strengthen and grow?

Do you recede when the worst circumstances come after you, do you curl up in intimidation when a certain authority stands over you, do you sit down in the gallows when it's time to rise up and claim your throne?

Do you rehearse your past failures, restating those things which seem impossible?

Winners don't quit, they do the opposite.T hey fall down and bounce back and make the most if it. They take blows, roll with punches, and never give up a in a fight until the battle is over, and it's not over if you're still alive...

Winners don't settle for a life of defeat,they can't see it, they won't claim it, and they only visualize victory. They don't lie back, they assert themselves, because in life it pays to seize. Every opportunity for success, and do whatever is necessary to succeed.

Winners don't back down in tough circumstances,they stand up for themselves, and then they learn to take chances. They push forward with all their willpower and rehearse many fighters' stances. They ask questions, but they never accept negative answers.

Winners don't get any rest, because to rest during a battle is to guarantee certain death. They work hard, they pray harder, and they keep their faith in motion, because closed mouths don't get fed, and prayer keeps your mouth open.