Welcome 2 New York City

Tomorrow can't get here fast enough. My first trip to New York City! The culture, the lights, the sounds, the sites, and basketball courts on every other corner. But most importantly all the sexy young ladies. And with my experience with Freedom School, NYC girls dig Southern cats anyway. My flight leaves at 6 in the morning, a brief layover in Tampa, and I should be touching down at JFK a little after 10. I've flown back and forth from L.A. by myself as a little kid many times so New York as a young adult shouldn't move too fast for me. Anyway, the game plan is to take the shuttle to my hotel in the Meadow Lands in New Jersey. Everyone, which includes my Freedom School people and my Eastern Shore (MD) people to meet me at the hotel. Which is cool cause you can see Manhattan skyline from there. Then we go into Manhattan for site seeing tour and then dinner for my birthday after midnight, which will be April 1st by that time. Then off to 40/40 if we can all get in. Then the next day is spilt between Harlem and the BX. Sunday is still up in the air cause I may ride to Philly to see Bianca. If not, I'm gonna hit up the other sites I haven't seen. I'm so excited.

Anyway, I need a few days rest anyway. I really dislike the majority of people I work with at T-Mobile. I've never been so unhappy working at a job. I know part of it is after working with Freedom School, you get kinda spoiled because even in it's rough parts it's still a very positive and loving environment. And we also have Mrs. Shepard who does a wonderful job with us and with the kids. But these white folks at T-Mobile are out of control. I'd rather work with Tye everyday than have to come here. But money is money, and a hustle is a hustle. So until the fall comes around, I'm here. It's getting close to being here for 6 months and I've wanted to quit everyday for the last 4 months. I got some bs service award in February, but I don't care. I deal with it. I guess at this point the only thing I can't shake off are my thoughts of Kenisha. It's been about a month since we spoke last. No call, no text message, no email. So whatever she is going through, is whatever she is going through. I know that our friendship is hard enough now that she is married, but it's always been so much more than that between us. I guess we all know that story by now. All my life I've grown accustomed to people leaving and it doesn't phase me, but somehow someway the very thought of her takes my collective breath away. But the sad thing is I still go on with my life, and it seems the more I push, the more I want to be with her. Sad. I sound like a punk. lol. I need to relax. I'm already nervous about Saturday. Why? Tishma.

Things were always kept on a very friendly level between us, but she has always made it well known that she has been digging me since the first day she saw me on Haley Farm in Tennesse. And I've made it well known that I was completely in love with someone back home. I just didn't tell her the complexity of the situation. I didn't think she needed to know. But she knows how strongly I feel about Kenisha. But with Kenisha (Shon) being incognegro, I think I owe it to myself to explore the possibilty of being that close with anyone else. And it helps she is fine. I know I know...shallow. But she is a crowd stopper. Her only downside I see to me at least is her son. If I ever start up something serious with anyone, it would be nice to start fresh. But no one is perfect, especially me.

Well, see ya when I get back. Deuce.

I hate my job

I started moving things back to Pensacola unofficially in September. I got hired offcially on November 1st. Today is March 1st. I want to quit. I've gotten use to working with nothing but black people and now I am the only black person at my work place. You know what, I'm not even gonna trip over this one today. Cause I can't even keep a clear thought today. I need a break from that place. If I don't get one soon, I may have to become Terrell Owens of T-Mobile. But I'm not apologizing for being me, a black man. If you don't want to hear what I talk about with other people when they ask me for my opinion, then don't listen. Deuce.

A quick announcement

I don't like white people today. Oh yeah, there is another reason why I don't like this day either. But oh well. At least this time, I'm not laying on my couch watching a Fairly Odd Parents Marathon. Actually, that doesn't sound like a bad idea. Today is just a bad day, but I will be greatful to God that he allowed me to see it, no matter how bad it seems at times...

(Shakes head)

I shouldn't have let her go in the park that night. I really miss her.

Happy Birthday BabyGirl!

Happy Birthday babygirl! I know that time flys and we miss out on a lot in life when we are not paying attention to the things we hold close to our hearts. I remember when you were 10 and 12 years old, you wanted to hang around me so much but I was younger and still in college trying to stay fly. But once I realized the things you were going through none of that mattered to me anymore. All I wanted was my precious Lil' B to be happy, healthy, and safe. And whatever it takes to help you grow and achieve your goals, I'm here for you. I've watched you blossom from a fat baby to my little yellow flower. Enjoy being 15 and enjoy being young. We both have a long way to go, but I thank you for being patient with me. I never thought I accept you growing up to be a young woman, but I'm trying. If I have a daughter that turns out to be as half as good as you then I did a great job as a father. Just know that your behind will be babysitting, especially in the summer. I love you.

It's finally over.

Today marked the last final I will take as an undergrad. This should be a happy time but this is one of the most unceremonious days I've had in my life. However, I'm not upset about it at all, the situation got handled but it's too late to participate in walking and I'm so fed up that I just want out. My own mother did not participate in her graduation ceremony, why, maybe because she had an over-sized child who couldn't sit still or getting through the process was celebration enough for her. Me, I've just had it with this place. The only reason I'm still here is because my advisor didn't advise well, the classes I needed to get out on time weren't offered, and they tried to change actually they did change my bulletin, which is illegal in most cases. But without struggle there is no progress. Whatever. I can work more hours for T-Mobile and FEMA and save up now. Either way, I know my true focus is helping my mom get back into her home. I don't like her current contractor and personally I've grown impatient with his lack of effort. Anyway, my family is still acting strange after the Bahamas trip and more than likely I won't even bother to tell them I'm done with school. It's not like any of them came and visited or sent money, food, or supplies. I worked my butt off for everything I accomplished and when I couldn't hold it down, by the Grace of God he had mom come through for me. I really do appreciate that ma'am. :-) Inside joke. Anyway, I'm not feeling T-Mobile too much already but those pay checks make some of my days worth being there for the moment. This is temporary. Although, a part of me wishes I took that job at AIG. But to take it a step further I would like to stay in Pensacola 3-4 years. I've missed being at home, I've missed my mom, I've missed the beach, OK...and I missed looking at a full refrigerator of REAL food everyday. The last few months have been late night studying and eating at IHOP. Oh...The IHOP. How I shall miss thee. Anyway, enough is enough time to take that next step. Learning how to be an adult. College life was easy. But praise his Holy name, I'm out like a fat kid in dodge ball. You know the next step...all accomplishments, awards, plaques, certificates, etc, get one more glance and into a box. I don't like reflecting on past accomplishments, you can't look forward if you're always looking back. Time for the next goal on my list.

Today's announcements

The BluePrint:Version B.I.G. blog announcements

Today's announcements are being brought to you by the number one, the color black, the letter W, and today's phrase is "Stupid...dunky slutty bitches."

1. Yes I do still blog, and when I am not blogging, I am writting to re-type those blogs later. But remember I just got a new job and I am still trying to get adjusted to my time changes.

2. The #1...Remember, you only got one time to think you are gonna try me and disrespect me. I don't even care if you are my boss. Not my fault you job is on the line. One word: Relax.

3. The color black. I love black women, all of ya'll. But to the people on my job (who are non-black) who are well...lets just say unprofessional, black is the color of my ass. Kiss it.

4. The letter W, stands for wish. As in "I wish a nigga would..." Excuse me unprofessional people at my job who claim I am not part of the team, lets get this straight. I don't hang with you cause I don't do what you do. I could care less about who you all are screwing, and why you have a rash on your ass, but most importantly I don't smoke. So I wish you would say something else about me behind my back, cause none of you all are loyal to each other, so I know what you say. Once I get my money, watch out.

5. Stupid slutty dinky bitches. No this not a knock on respect for women, but when you are a welll...you know. What I am amazed at that you know less than I do, we are sitting in training talking shyt and I found out the only 2 jobs you have ever had was a Budweiser girl and a Hooter's girl. Damn, shut up. You already look worn out and we know you are slutty. We know how you got your job. Refer to #2.

With that being said, I'll back date as much as possible this weekend. Holla at your boy.

We are family

5 pounds of shrimp for a big family dinner: $35
Renting a van and driving from Florida to Colorado for a wedding: $650
3 generations in one picture and no one talking shyt: Priceless

Dammit, they get on my nerves, but I love them.

Back row:

Uncle Sidney, Uncle Russell, Uncle Fred, Me

2nd row:

Carmen, Mom, Tonya, Michelle, Jo, Doug

3rd row:

Auntee Helen, Tiffany, Nicole

Very front:

Mamadear

7 dealy sins...FULL TIME JACK MOVE.

ANGER
1. who did you last get angry with? Ashley E. Yates
2. what is your weapon of choice? My baseball bat.
3. would you hit a member of the opposite sex? No.
4. how about of the same sex? If need be.
5. who was the last person who got really angry at you? I hope it was Ashley. JERK!
6. what is your pet peeve? Black girls that talk spit, then date white boys.
7. do you keep grudges, or can you let them go easily? Doesn't matter.

SLOTH
1. what is one thing you're supposed to do daily that you haven't done in a long time? Strecth.
2. what is the latest you've ever woken up? I've slept all day before.
3. who have you been meaning to contact, but haven't? Bianca
4. what is the last lame excuse you made? Ashley is just having a hard time.
5. have you ever watched an infomercial all the way through (one of the long ones...)? NO!
6. how many times did you hit the snooze button on your alarm clock today? 1

GLUTTONY
1. what is your overpriced yuppie beverage of choice? Rum Runners at TGI Fridays
2. meat eaters are?: Huh? Yeah. Whatever.
3. what is the greatest amount of alcohol you've had in one sitting/outing/event? Don't remember.
4. have you ever used a professional diet company? Oh hell no.
5. do you prefer sweets, salty foods or spicy foods? SPICY!

LUST
1. how many people have you seen completely naked (not counting movies/family)? I plead the "fif"
2. how many people have seen you completely naked (not counting physicians/family)? I plead the "fif"
3. have you ever caught yourself staring at the chest/crotch of a member of your gender of choice during a normal conversation? I plead the "fif"
4. what is your favorite body part on a person of your gender of choice? Entire body.
5. have you ever been made a proposition by a prostitute? No.
6. have you ever had to get tested for an std or pregnancy? Not me.
7. is love at first sight really lust? No.

GREED
1. how many credit cards do you own? 0
2. what's your guilty pleasure store? Lids, Fossil, S & K.
3. if you had $1 million, what would you do with it? Figure how to flip it to 2. Then 2 to 4. So forth and so on.
4. would you rather be rich or famous? Rich. You'll be famous and living ther life.
5. would you accept a boring job if it meant you would make megabucks? Yep. Then pimp the game and stike out on my own.
6. have you ever stolen anything? A kiss. But she didn't mind.
7. how many mp3s are on your hard drive? Don't know.

PRIDE
1. what is one thing that you have done that you're most proud of? Believed in myself
2. what's one thing you've done that your parents are most proud of? Gone to college and suceed.
3. what thing would you like to accomplish in your life? To be a good husband and father.
4. do you get annoyed by coming in second place? YES
5. have you ever entered a contest of skill, knowing you were of much higher skill than all the other competitors? LOL. YEP!
6. have you ever cheated on something to get a higher score? Maybe.
7. what did you do today that you're proud of? I didn't curse Ashley out for calling me a bitch.

ENVY
1. what item (or person) of your friends would you most want to have for yourself? RJJ's bank account.
2. who would you want to go on "trading spaces" with? Jay-Z
3. if you could be anyone else in the world, who would you be? No one. But especially not that jerk Ashley.
4. have you ever been cheated on? No.
5. have you ever cheated? Nope. I wanted to though. Sorry Audra.

For the record...

For those who kept sending me messages on facebook, let's get this one thing straight. I am NOT a smoker. I got so many messages, I had to change the picture. People I hadn't heard from in a minute was getting at me about this picture. Look, I tried it one time a couple of years ago on a cruise to Mexico. They were selling Cuban cigars (Cohibas), which are illegal in the United States, and I wanted to try one. The end result..I got very sick. And yes, I smoked the whole thing. For the money I paid, I had no choice. Would I do it again? I tried this summer in the Bahamas. It didn't work out. I couldn't even get it lit. Even God didn't want me to have that cigar. No matter where I went, it wasn't happening. Oh well. But just to be let it be known, I'm not a smoker.

If this is

If this is the end, why doesn't it feel like it?

If this is the end, why are we closer now?

If this is the end, why don't we want to leave?

If this is the end, why does something wrong, feel so right?

Maybe, it's not an end. Just a new beginning for us.

End of an era

This is never how you want to remember our sport heroes. Hanging on too long, seeing them perform at a level that as fans we aren't use to. Seeing Micheal Jordan for two years in a Wizards uniform was hard to deal with. The lasting image of him taking that game winning shot in the last of his six championships is the image we care to remember. And yet tonight, we watched the Micheal Jordan of boxing maybe hanging on a couple of fights too many. It wasn't that long ago when Roy Jones Jr. made history by stepping up to the heavyweight division and taking a title from a much larger opponent in John Ruiz. Everything he fought for was maginfied in that unanimous 12 round decision. In retrospect, winning the heavy weight title was Jones Jr's lasting image. Cementing his title as the best pound for pound fighter ever. Essentially, being the best ever since Ali. However, just like MJ, Jones Jr. held on a little too long. When you have dominated 4 divisions (light, middle, light heavy, and heavy) and undefeated in those bouts, the only place from there is down. However, just like Jordan and Ali, as fans we ultimaltey don't care. Because forever in our hearts you are always the champ.

I first met Roy Jones Jr. as a young child while visiting my grandmother early in the summer of '88 before the Seoul, Korea Olympics. He was ultimately robbed of a gold medal, which is opponent said he lost the fight to Roy, but that let down fueled the next 17 years of dominance. Before the first Tarver loss, he was disqualified for hitting his opponent that took a knee during mid punch. That only enhanced his legend. But during those years and those divisions, it was an amazing thing to see. I remember "The Mission Continues" stickers and shirts in the early days when I moved to Pensacola. Jones Jr. made opponents look like mere sparing partners. Before HBO, those fights were at the Bayfront Auditorium. Then he moved to fights on ABC. But what impressed me the most, when he made the promise to make his first title defense at home. So when the time came he passed on millions and told HBO to meet him at the Pensacola Civic Center. The entire world tuned into to see the next great champion. Although the fight lasted only about 3 rounds. It felt good to see a home grown product, put his city on his back and start walking. And walk he did, through 4 divisions undefeated. His critcis would say that he didn't fight anyone. Sorry...he was just that much better than everyone else. He beat legends in Vinny P, and dominated a handful of eventual heavy weight champions, including James "Lights Out" Toney. Maybe even more impressive beating Montell Griffin with a broken hand.

But after 3 straight losses, it seems as the sun has set on aa brillant career. Even though he lost a 12 Round decision to Antonio Tarver, it was inspiring to see Roy give it one more try and walking away with a smile on his face. Two guys who literally hated each other since the day they met at 13, walked away with the up most respect for each other. Thanks Roy for representing our city so well, for so long. You'll always be The Champ to us.

A new start with a old twist.

Just like the title says, it's a new start. Over time, I going to reflect on the past and times in my life that I thought I was all too forgotten at this point. Also, I write because I want this to serve as a documentation for my children one day, and their kids. Something they can always have of me that can't be bought or sold. My life. My experiences. My trials. My victories. Oh, one more thing. To this day I have not shared this entire blog with anyone voluntarily. I would like to share this with her. I'm not sure who she is yet, but one day I want to say "Here is me. The good the bad and the ugly. I've grown/growing into a man of God. " I still pray to meet her one day. Hopefully, she and they will understand my thoughts and my life, and know that life has it's ups and downs, so enjoy life and make everyday your masterpiece.

Ev

Stop. No. Don't.

Some how telemarketers have made there way to my blog. Let me say this one time and one time only. Stop. No. Don't. I don't want to work at home. I don't want a once and a life time vacation. I don't want any business ideas. This is just a place for me to get my thoughts out. So before I report you...No I don't care about your porn site. No don't bookmark me and send it to your subscribers. If you do, I better see a pay check on the first. So just stop.

I got a question for you...

Let me ask you a question...

DO I LOOK LIKE A GIVE A SHYT ABOUT WHAT YOU THINK?

Before you go on reporting on my life, get your facts straight, so hopefully your thoughts can be a little more in depth, rather than surface irrational emotional rants about subjects that either don't concern you, or you don't have full knowledge. But when you are ready to talk to me like and adult, holla at your boy.

A small reminder:

I told you when this happened back in June or July. So why is it a surprise now?

$$$

I got hired at T-Mobile today. It's time to do the get money dance. YEAH!

WHAT?

OKAY?

And cut.

Deep breath. I think I'm gonna keep this one for a minute. T-Mobile, get more out of life...bitches!

I PLEAD THE "FIF"!

10 Years Ago-I was a rock head freshmen in high school. Wait, I just finished that year, and the summer was good. I had this cute little girlfriend named Donecia LaChe' Coker a.k.a. Che' a.k.a. #3. Everything seemed kind right with the world. Although I was till getting use to living in the "Da Hood", everything seemed alright.

5 Years Ago-The first year of college. Bevill St gave me a basketball scholarship. For what it was worth, the experience of being away from home was the best. It was the first time and some of the best times. The road trips, the practices, the games, the free clothes, the free shoes, and the free food.

1 Year Ago-FREEDOM SCHOOL! I can and must make a difference.

Yesterday-Watched the Florida St.-Miami football game. It wasn't quit the classic we are use to seeing. But it was a game none the less. Miami missed the field goal this time.

Today-No comment.

Tomorrow-Trying to figure out how to get to where I want to be.

5 Snacks I enjoy-Snickers, Mangos, Popcorn, Checker Fries, Kenisha and Penelope.

5 bands that I know the lyrics to most of their songs-Earth, Wind, and Fire, 112, Boys 2 Men, Maroon 5, and Aerosmith. (I'm lying about one of these, but which one?)

5 things I'd do with $100,000,000-Get far away from hurricanes as possible. Buy mom a house, take Kenisha shopping and out to dinner, pay off all my immediate family's debt, and open up a business.

5 Locations I'd like to run away to-Brazil, Paris, South Africa, Trinidad, Hong Kong

5 Bad habits I have-Biting my nails. Driving too fast. Forgetting to call back. Chewing ice. Misplacing my keys.

5 Things I like doing-Basketball, lifting weights, writing, chillin', reading.

5 Things I'd never wear-Anything Tommy Hilfiger, anymore Fubu, anything that looks like it came from the 70's or 80's, my clothes backwards, or those MC Hammer pants.

5 TV shows I like-PTI, King Of The Hill, WildnOut, The 2nite Show, MSNBC News.

5 Movies I like-Bad Boys 2, Hustle and Flow, Coming To America, Never Die Alone, Trading Places.

5 famous people I'd like to meet-Gabrielle Union, The Rock, Rihanna, Magic Johnson, Mariah Carey.

5 biggest joys at the moment-Waking up. My freedom. Traveling. My family when they not fussing. Late night trips to Krispy Kream or IHOP.

5 favorite toys-My cell phone. My computer. My Foreman grill. My solution basketball. My fossil watch.

5 people to tag-Hmmm, I think everyone has done this thing already. But I got some folks in mind fo' next time!

........

There are no words to describe what I am about to say. I considered not putting this in my blog, but I will anyway. Hmmmm....

Where do I start?

Okay. See what had happened was...And then. Well...So, it was like. And...

Let me start over. The job I came to Atlanta to interview for went well. Then by circumstances out of my control, so I'll be in town until Saturday. So of course Shon wanted to see me. I know we did some things that day, and went places and enjoyed each others company. We had a good time. It's just how the day ended.

Wow.

I didn't plan it. But I guess passion is never planned. Being with Shon is like being at home. You feel safe there, you feel loved there, and you feel like you belong. Everytime, we have been together, it feels right. So how could something wrong feel so right? Love? Lust? Passion? I think it's possible to have all of that for one person. However, something was extra special about this time. It was like our best on another level. I have no words to describe that moment. But I do know we have stamina. Wow.

Let me stop, thats her on the phone. I'm headed home on soon. I guess we'll do lunch after she gets her hair done, and then it's back to Florida. I guess no matter how complicated this ting gets, we still love each so much.

It's ya baby, baby.

Somebody finally said it!

The International Asshole at his finest...

“I hate the way they portray us in the media. You see a black family, it says, ‘They're looting.’ You see a white family, it says, ‘They're looking for food. It's been five days [waiting for federal help] because most of the people are black.” “And even for me to complain about it, I would be a hypocrite because I've tried to turn away from the TV because it's too hard to watch. I've even been shopping before even giving a donation, so now I'm calling my business manager right now to see what is the biggest amount I can give…the way America is set up to help the poor, the black people, the less well-off, as slow as possible. I mean, the Red Cross is doing everything they can. We already realize a lot of people that could help are at war right now, fighting another way -- and they've given them permission to go down and shoot us!”

[Mike Meyers reads his part]


Re-enter Kanye West:
"George Bush doesn't care about black people."

Thank you Kanye West, for saying on live national television what black people have known from jump. It's unfortunate that it took Hurricane Katrina and the aftermath to make some people realize it, but better late than never.

If nothing else, this catastrophe has made us realize how important it is to help our people, especially those less fortunate than us.

What if Natalie Holloway was black?

I'm never the one to crack jokes in the time of sorrow or tragedy, but since this thing has gone on for a minute with the missing white girl in Aruba, it brought me to this question. What if Natalie Holloway was black? Let's say she was still from Birmingham, and a outgoing high school senior. But instead of going to Huffan, a practically all white high school in the suburbs of Birmingham, but went to a school in West End or Ensley, where all the blacks folk stay. Could you imagine the that news story?

First of all they wouldn't have went to Aruba, this little girl would have come up missing over night from Six Flags, in Atlanta. Secondly, that search would have been over after the weekend. I'm just amazed they sent the FBI looking for this girl, and nobody went looking for 2pac's killers and they shot him on the Veags strip. There had to be 600 people standing outside of Circus Circus at the time. Nicole Holloway can't rap...I want justice.

Letter to the President

Dear President Bush,

How can I say this...um, you're fucking up. I rode by the gas station today and it was $2.59 a gallon. Let's just be real about this situation, I'm not made if you make that area the 51st state and call it Texaco. Just be honest about this thing. If gas hits 3 dollars a gallon, I'm getting a bike. I'm not worried about the moon, Mars, gays getting married (although it's gross), stem cells, it's these gas prices. Look, finish one thing at a time. We went to look for Bin Laden and most of the time we have been in Iraq. If we won the war, why are our troops still dying everyday? Here, I'll give you a chance to make this thing right. Give me Bin Laden on my front porch and I can deal with the gas. I'll beat his ass for you. I'll do him like the cops in NY, I got a plunger. Just do something. It's on you. One or the other, cause the more you mess up, the more you make Bill look like a genuis. A sex addict genuis, but a genuis non the less. I paid about a dollar a gallon when he was in office, there was no war, and no enemies would have ever thought about bringing the fight to us on our soil. Think about it for a minute. Oh, and another piece of advice, think that No Child Left Behind thing over again. You're screwing a lot of liitle kids over. Cool? Holla at cha' boy.

Ev